Dining at FATS is offering more selection and locations than ever before! The Fredonian Academy of Tolkien Studies Dining Services offers customer-oriented eateries featuring only Tolkien-validated menu selections. Nothing will be served that lacks a canonical basis, i.e., that cannot be found in Tolkien's works. Options include FATS brands of mushroom gruel; mushed rabbits with what used to be potatoes; goblin; semi-gourmet coffee and tea; smoothies; Big Mac FATSburgers (with onion rings of power); hamfastburgers (the only meat the Gaffer would consent to eat, probably because he didn't know what animal it was); cheesy-script-burgers; freddie macs, conisting of Sandyman's bricks (named in honor of King Fred: royally good!); cain macs, which have a fried palin(tir); milkshakes (created by placing huge cans of milk into the rooms where Horus lectures and letting his speeches shaken them to their depths); Denethor's Special (everything you can eat with your face); and so much more!

Students Enjoying a Meal in the Mess Hall

Our Cafeterias Have a Unique Aesthetic Based on Strict Tolkienological Principles

Food at FATS is prepared according to centuries-old artisanal practices.

Our luxury fare reminds students of the Universe itself.

If you stare at it long enough, you can see TOLKIEN's face.


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