I wants to see John Rhys-Davies’ pants set on fire and then see him get chased all around Colosseum by ravenous smurfs.


John Rhys-Davies should be served, charred, smoking, rred from the bone, to the starving smurfs, and to Kim Basinger in a cat suit. As for Tolkien, well dost thou know that Tolkien was Mel Gibson’s evil aunt, chasing him through the outback with her umbrella.